Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Dear White Bulldog
Like a fighting bull from Hell, you came barreling out of your garage towards Sebastian and me on our evening walk. Probably because you noticed that my meat would be acrid and metallic, you went for the sweet meat of Sebastian. You got a couple good bites in, but your fate was sealed when later I returned to the house to make sure you were OK and your shots were up to date. Your master, who refused to have a civilized conversation with me, was combative and no less aggressive than you (though he didn't bite my leg). For his obstinacy, you can expect a visit from Animal Control tomorrow who will inevitably write your bulldog of a master a $50 ticket for violating the county leash law. I hope you are prepared to produce shot records as well. By the way, it'd be to your interest if you have had no prior convictions because after the third complaint, you go big nappy time. You mess with the bull, you get the horns; you mess with Basty, you get a world of hurt (or at least a $50 ticket).
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"after the third complaint, you go big nappy"... Right on!
When I lived in the maggot house, Zissou was attacked by two pit bulls one morning before a job interview to a job I ended up refusing... They had one complaint before attacking Zissou and could get back into their yard before animal control would get there so there was nothing that could be done... Until they were in my yard again a week later trying to get into my maggot house (though this was three days before the maggot event) because they were hungry and Zissou was meaty and weak.
They went sleepy time... one went the peaceful way... the other I bashed in with a metal bat.
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