Samson Under Attack!

Samson and his comrades are under attack. A militant group of insects of unknown origin have established enclaves somewhere in the vicinity of my otherwise peaceful garden. They enter the garden with little regard for the local laws, respecting only their own barbaric customs, and endeavor to destroy the Perfect Garden. In an effort to purge my harmonious nation of tomatoes and peppers of these illegal invaders, I have dusted the crop with Sevin 5, an agro-chemical pesticide. There will be no amnesty for Japanese beetles, snails, slugs, or spider mites in this garden. Such a move would only cheapen the significance of citizenship granted to legitimate residents and would be unfair to the basil plants currently awaiting entrance to the garden (thank you basil plants for respecting the process of citizenship). My crop is a bountiful crop, no doubt a hospitable environment for any creature, but residence in my garden is limited to those to enter by legitimate means: first and foremost one must have my approval, which is established by demonstrating that one will uphold the principles of perfection established for the garden. There may be a waiting period before applicants can begin to set down roots in the garden, but this waiting period pays dividend in terms of harmony and rights to the resources of the garden. There is food in every pot and there is a excellent heathcare system. Maintaining harmony requires that there be a careful screening process to ensure that leaches (slugs, snails, weeds, etc.) do not fleece the garden of its resources. Second, citizens of the garden must be willing to pay taxes. You do nothing for the garden if you do not contribute to the general coffers with either fruit or aromatics. Free loaders will be deported to the compost heap. This also applies to those birds (you know who you are) who enter the garden illegally, steal from the coffers, and send the fruit back to their home-nests. We enjoy an isolationist existence in my garden. Maintaining the welfare of impoverished bird/bug-nations is not part of our foreign policy; expect borders around the garden to be strengthened in the coming days. A militia of scarecrows and other deterrents will be implemented. If need be, snipers will be deployed. Non-deleterious foreign influences are welcome. I say this to those of you who wish to visit and pollinate tomato and pepper flowers. You may enter and leave at your leisure provided you wear the mandatory yellow jacket or Blind Melon "Bee Girl" uniform. However, those of you without the uniforms will be considered in violation of Perfect Garden's Perfect Airspace. Airborne toxins will be scrambled to escort you away from Perfect Airspace and to your demise.